He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
Bring me that man meat
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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