ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
