i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
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