you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize
