we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
