Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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