I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Randomize
