I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
