In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
