I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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