That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
Well I just put wine in my tea
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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