He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Randomize
