How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Randomize
