we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Randomize
