I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
Randomize
