the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
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