i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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