69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Randomize
