I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
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