we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Randomize
