That's intense
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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