Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
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