ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
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