She's JV to your varsity
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
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