well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
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