oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
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