just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
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