Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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