two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
