this boner is exhausting
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
