Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
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