Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize
