Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
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