Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
