just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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