their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
i don't like sucking hair
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
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