And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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