I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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