Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
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