i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
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