You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
He passed out mid-signature
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Randomize
