Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
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