worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Randomize
