my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
