i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
