Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
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