There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
