We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Randomize
