I skipped work to stalk him.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
Randomize
