I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Randomize
