If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
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