After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
